This is a process that can be applied to all aspects of your life. It is an exercise that is often difficult but like all exercise it will make you stronger when practiced regularly. The goal is to identify events in your life (both good and bad), process the events and then own the results. Owning the result of an event (good or bad) allows you to learn and grow. Taking this approach can be difficult and uncomfortable at times, especially owning the result of your actions but it is very rewarding. The way to become comfortable with this process is to repeat the process until it becomes second nature. Eventually, you will be able to skip the write it portion and perform the exercise naturally. You will likely notice the results quickly…. You have also already experienced this process.
You were exposed to this thought exercise during your Medical Training. It plays out in every Academic training program in the Country. It is better known as the Morbidity and Mortality (M & M) conference. Presenting an M and M can be uncomfortable for a learning Physician but it is immensely important. The process is uncomfortable because it forces you to look at your mistakes, own them, learn from them and share your experience to advance patient care and help other Physicians. It is an incredibly important exercise for the education of physicians, advancement of medicine and improvement of patient care. It is also something you should consider practicing to improve your personal and financial well-being.
A personal example:
Write it: I had an argument with Lauren last night. She was talking about something that had occurred and was frustrated. I gave advice trying to “fix” the problem instead of “listening”.
Process it: I was trying to be helpful by providing solutions “from my perspective”. However, what she needed was someone to listen to her talk out the situation. She was working through her process by speaking to me and my desire to be “helpful” by trying to “fix” the problem was actually disrupting her ability to reach her own solution
Own it: My well-intended goal trying to “fix” the problem instead of “listening” to the problem was not helpful…. Next time I listened without trying to solve all the problems. Lauren talked out her situation and found her own solution. I provided a safe environment by simply listening and allowing her to process her thoughts.
A financial example:
Write it: I bought a condo in residency right before the great recession. I ended up owing more on the property than it was worth…